Non-Churched Spirituality/Religion

And Odd Suggestion for Still Going to Church

Data keeps coming in. Yes, we live in an age of secularity as many of the theorists of secularity predicted. Yet, the way we are secular is not what they imagined. Charles Taylor has painted a better picture of the reality. The Secular Age is not one where religion and spirituality have disappeared. It is not a time of pure nature, a world sans enchantment. It is rather that the old notions of sacred, the holy, or God have more competition. As James K.A. Smith has pointed out, we are all religious. I think Schmemann is correct, humans are animals of adoration. We are worshipping animals. And the secular age is one where some go to traditional church services. Others, stream online or watch many preachers on different platforms. Some do therapy or 12 steps. Others find the sacred on a mushroom hunt and a personal retreat. Others find spirituality in practices/disciples without the weight of belief in the divine at all. And still others hold traditional theological beliefs but no longer find the church worth their time. In sum, the secular age is one where there is a lot of competition for the “most important,” ordering principle in our lives.

As a Christian theologian and as a member of the clergy, I often ask myself how am I to speak in such a world. Am I being of service to people by continuing to promote the institution of the church? Don’t get me wrong, I believe in the church. I believe in it because I believe that one thing God does in Jesus is asks us to be a human family, and so we need a place and community to be called to where we would not choose to belong if we were left up to our own interests, peccadilloes, prejudices, and voting patterns. I grieve the polls that report that religious people only wish to worship with people who share the same political beliefs or the ones that suggest that folks would rather their children marry outside of their faith over their political party! I also believe in the church, because I think we are supposed to be more human than we are. And I learn how to be more humane by being put into relationships with people who have a different story than my own, and with people that sometimes annoy me, or whom I annoy in return. If we don’t have something like that, then we tend to splinter off into homogeneous zones of social comfort. How banal. And to the extent that the church has operated in that same, banal and morally specious fashion, it is a sin that runs counter the church’s own mission, purpose, and calling.

The real question facing people today who believe in God, but struggle with the church is does it add anything to people’s lives. And to this I might add questions that are interrupted by kids in travel sports, specialized music programs, traveling work schedules, hobbies and interests that are life giving, and who can access content anywhere and find a group that fits their interests online, etc. Is there anything that a church that meets in an old building, that does some frustrating things at times, and is sometimes out of step, can offer to credibly add value to anyone’s daily life? Avoiding the obvious theological individualism and consumerism of the question, I do forgive many for feeling like they “get God” all over the place, why do they need to move their lives around to attend and be part of a church when their lives are so hectic?

I have theological answers to this question. But no one is buying. So let me sell something else, though in my cynicism I doubt that it will do the trick either. And I have already given the sales pitch: go to church, learn how to be a human being. We all need “strange friendships.” We all benefit from other stories, styles, and points of view. In our fragmented, highly mobilized, and fractious world, where else than in a place of deliberate intentional community like a church will you be firmly held in the thrall of a community not of one’s own choosing? A family! If you thought family, well maybe that makes sense for a good reason. Theologically, the church is a foretaste of a new human family where the peace is always passed, and a common cup is shared. It is where forgiveness is tried and practiced, and where confession is made. It is a place of affirmation and a place where one can be called to do better. And though people “church shop” and treat a church as a consumable item, really you are not supposed to be so choosey. And at the end of the day, no matter which one you choose you will be forced into relationships not of your own design—and you will be a better human being for it.

I believe that if Christians, and followers of other faith traditions were at least true to their communal calling, then maybe our polarized world would be aided. How can we hold such burning and divisive attitudes toward others when we are put into relationship with them in such an intimate and communal way? Much of our contemporary division stems for misunderstanding and otherizing. It is less easy to make an other out of someone that you regularly eat with. It is less easy to make hasty judgements about someone else’s intentions or motivations when you see them care deeply about others in service, comfort, and care. It is hard to keep up the illusions of our egos when we are faced with other people—people hold up mirrors to us, so that we can more easily see ourselves. So when we engage in real community, with people who we would not always choose left to ourselves, we will no doubt learn to see ourselves in new ways.

Of course going to church is no panacea. When there, we need to be real. We need to embody the words of the liturgies which are full of confession, forgiveness, peace, and transformation—in short we need to show up for transformational communal experiences, not simply to appease our individualistic or self-interested inclinations. But more on that for another day. I do see some value still in the church…whatever she looks like…for people today. Show up, maybe you’ll become more human.